How to Persuade People: 17 Tactics to Get Inside Someone’s Mind

There’s always that one person who seems to get away with whatever they want. They’re not special, but they know how to persuade people.

I used to have a friend who would be able to get anyone to do anything they wanted. I would just sit in amazement thinking that they had some special powers that I could never obtain. I mean, am I really that different from this person? Not at all. But if you want to know how to persuade people, there are a couple qualities you have to have.

This is how to persuade people

If you have a persuasive friend, watch them and you’ll be able to see that they have some of these qualities that’ll be listed below.

Persuasive people aren’t from special creation, they just know how to pull the right strings and know the right things to say. So, what I’m trying to say is, this is something that can be learned. If you want things to go your way, this is how to persuade people.

#1 Have confidence. If you want to know how to persuade people, you won’t be doing it if you’re unsure of what to say, if you think you’re not attractive enough, or if you think no one will listen to you. Because you’re right.

If you believe that about yourself, it’s going to show. Persuasive people are confident, and that’s why people listen to them. They’re leaders. [Read: How to build self-confidence – 16 ways to realize you’re worth it]

#2 Really listen. But like actually listen. Sure, persuasive people may be charismatic and charming, but don’t think their ears are clogged with their own thoughts. It’s rather the opposite. They’re highly in tune with what people have to say, because that’s how they gauge their audience’s emotional and mental state. So, if you’re not a good listener, learn to become one.

#3 Build relationships. Persuasive people are highly likeable. You want to be their friend and they’ll never shut you out from obtaining that relationship. If someone isn’t emotionally invested in a persuasive person, then they won’t be able to persuade them. Be the guy. [Read: How to be more social – 19 ways to genuinely connect with others]

#4 Know when to shut up. They’re not going to fight every battle. In fact, persuasive people know which battles to enter and which ones to walk away from. Persuasive people aren’t the ones to argue with people until they give in. That’s not the strategy… instead, go silent.

#5 Back off sometimes. If you appear too desperate, you won’t be able to persuade. People can smell desperation a mile away, and urgency never gets people on your side. You have to know when to back off and give people their space to think things over. If you don’t, you’ll lose the persuasion battle. [Read: Emotional manipulation – How people mess with your mind]

#6 Don’t push. People who are pushy are never going to win over anyone. Have you ever been to a store where the clerk won’t leave you alone? You probably decided to just walk out instead of going through the shop. They suffocate you. If you want to persuade, you can’t be pushy.

#7 Sound secure. Whether you’re trying to sell something or get people to join you on a belief, you have to know what you’re talking about. Now, you can’t sound like a know-it-all… that’s arrogance. And that’s another thing people can’t stand. However, you should know your product and have the answers ready.

#8 Be empathetic. Persuasive people are empathetic. If they weren’t, they wouldn’t be able to relate to their audience and they wouldn’t be able to persuade anyone. If you want to know how to persuade people, you have to be able to understand where they’re coming from and what they need. [Read: Useful life tips – 9 sure ways to be a lot more charismatic instantly]

#9 It’s all about timing. Timing is crucial. Will you be trying to persuade someone who just lost their dog? No. It’s all about timing. You need to figure out who you’re going to persuade and choose the best time to do it. It could be over some drinks or while you’re walking your dog.

#10 Speak the same language. This ties into empathy. If the person you’re trying to persuade likes to swear a lot, you blend yourself into the way they talk. If they talk with a formal tone, you talk with a formal tone. Match them. Become them.

#11 Don’t knock people down. First of all, that’s generally a lame power tactic. Knowing how to persuade people isn’t about making them feel beneath you. It’s about making them feel that they can accomplish something great. If you make fun of them or knock their self-esteem, well, you’re an amateur.

#12 Know who to persuade. Listen, everyone can be persuaded. However, some people you won’t be able to persuade in the short term. What you have to do is spot the people who can be persuaded at that time. Then after that, you can focus on those who will take a longer time to persuade. [Read: 9 ways men manipulate and control their girlfriends]

#13 Be honest. Persuasive people have no problem telling you the truth about yourself. In fact, it works in their favor, as you’ll then see them as honest and genuine people, which means you’ll open up to them and trust them. See, what I mean? You’ve probably had a couple of those experiences happen to you.

#14 Be persistent. Persistence pays off, lemme tell ya. Persuasive people will usually stick to their gut and keep going for what they want. They’ll show their worth and their hunger for something which makes them highly persuasive. So, if you see something you want, just keep biting at it.

#15 Reciprocate. Now, persuasive people aren’t throwing themselves out on a limb and do things for you that are really above and beyond. Instead, they reciprocate disproportionately. So, they will do small gestures, however, they’ll ask for a larger favor in return.

#16 Make that person interested. Persuasive people love themselves, and they’ll listen to anyone who is talking about them. So, to be persuasive, you have to be able to talk about that person. That way, you’ll get their attention immediately, and they’ll be interested in the conversation.

#17 Nod or shake your head. Want someone to agree with anything you say? Just keep nodding your head up and down as you say whatever it is you want to say. They won’t even realize it, but they’ll find themselves agreeing with you. On the other hand, want to convey a negative idea that you want declined? just shake your head left and right as you suggest it, and presto, they’ll realize it’s a bad idea too!

[Read: The art of getting anyone to like you immediately]

Now that you know how to persuade people, put these steps into use. It’s actually not that hard, you just need to keep your ears and eyes open, know your target, and shoot.

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