Thursday, December 8, 2016

I Miss My Girlfriend: 20 Ways to Banish the Thought for Good

When you break up with your girlfriend, your most common thought is probably: I miss my girlfriend. But here are some things you will NOT miss.

There is almost nothing more difficult than going through a breakup. Whether you are together for two months or thirty years, if you thought she was the one, it may feel like you won’t ever feel the same way again.

Just like no one thinks ill of the dead, when you weren’t expecting the love of your life to walk away, you may be fooling yourself into believing that you are missing more than you really are.

The truth is that girls can either be your best friend or your worst enemy – your biggest fantasy or your worst nightmare – and all within ten minutes. Moody, emotional, and sometimes sarcastic, if you want to get past missing her, it may involve thinking about all the things that you DIDN’T like about her, instead of all the things that you miss. That way, you can stop the repeating the dreaded thought “I miss my girlfriend” from taking over your mind.

How to stop thinking, “I miss my girlfriend” – 20 things you definitely won’t miss

Right after a breakup, it might seem like nothing will ever be the same. We thought we were in love, but suddenly it’s over. But if you keep these things in mind, you won’t miss her for much longer. [Read: How to heal your broken heart the wicked way]

#1 The excessive questions. Women are not only like a puzzle sometimes, but they also seem to ask more questions than anyone would possibly ever need to know. It was probably like being with a two-year-old in a car!

Do you remember those days when your girlfriend was feeling insecure and met you at the door with “how was your day,” and then a million other questions followed? Yep, sure you do. But you won’t have to deal with that anymore.

#2 No more time watch. If you said that you were going to be home at 10:00, but got back at 10:20, she would probably punish you in some way.

It was as if her biological clock was more of a time clock, and time was truly of the essence. Take heart, now that she isn’t around, you can come home anytime you want – and no one will care or be waiting with that pissed off look on her face. [Read: Why are women so crazy and fickle in love?]

#3 No more chick flicks. You don’t have to spend your weekend nights *or your money* watching a movie that will only have her leaving the theater wishing you could be just as romantic as the guy in the film. Only adventure and horror movies going forward! Yipee!

#4 No more cyclical months. She may have been the one who got her period, but what you got is the silent treatment, a drudge up of an argument from the distant past, or just someone who is pre-pissed for no reason at all. So whenever you’re thinking, “I miss your girlfriend,” think about no more monthly bitchiness to put up with.

#5 No more makeup on your sink. When you date a woman, you not only have to give up your own style and taste, you have to give up your vanity sink for her cosmetics. No more mascara stuck into the grout. And your toothpaste might not have its cap, but no one cares but you!

#6 Eat whatever you want. Most girls are all over you about your habits, such as what you eat. If you come home with gas or an upset stomach, there won’t be anyone reminding you like Captain Obvious that you shouldn’t have had dairy or hot wings for lunch. Eat what you want, when you want. [Read: 15 reasons why being single can be a whole lot of fun!]

#7 Guys night any night. Sometimes it probably felt like asking your mom if you could have a play date. Now that you are single again, you can go out with the guys anytime you want. Guys night can be every night without anyone waiting at home for you and giving you the third degree when you walk in.

#8 No more pretending you like things. Remember all the times you had to eat something you didn’t like because she was trying out a new recipe? The good news is that if you don’t like something, you don’t have to suffer through eating it, or facing the consequence. That is definitely one thing that you won’t miss!

#9 No more bail me out calls. When her car ran out of gas, she forgot her purse, or her tire pops, you are no longer the first on the list of emergency contacts. There will be no more things that you have to add to your already stressful life. She is on her own and has to handle her own problems now. [Read: 14 things to keep in mind when you bump into your ex]

#10 No more girl talk. Was there anything worse than when she would invite her single friends out with you, or over to your place for the evening? Like listening to two screaming eagles, when you are with girls who gossip and cackle about other people, you have as much fun as you would if you were sticking needles in your eyes.

#11 No more play dates. Even worse than the single friends she brought over, don’t forget about the dreaded times when she set you up with her friend’s boyfriends.

Is there anything more uncomfortable than feeling like you are a four-year-old as a grown man, forced to become friends with someone who you have nothing in common with? That will definitely not be missed.

#12 You don’t have to hear “what’s wrong?” Girls can’t ever let a situation be. If you have something on your mind, and you are trying to work it through, they think that it is their duty to get it out of you and help you solve it. More than likely, all she did was slow down the process and make it more difficult for you to get to a resolution.

#13 You can make your own plans again. If it seemed like your weekends were already carved in stone for you, there is a reason for that. Women are planners, and if they aren’t set up for the weekend, they don’t know what to do with themselves.

The only problem is that after a long work week, you would rather sit on your couch in your underwear… and now you can.

#14 No more hearing about how your friends are shit bags. You know that your friend John who texts you horrible sexual content and comes to town and agitates your relationship is a shit bag, but he is your shit bag. The good news is that you can hang out with anyone you want, and she won’t have a thing to say about it.

#15 No more “Ms. Mad” when you walk in the door. Remember when you walked in the front door, and you could feel her anger from across the room? Most of the time you had no idea what you did, and since she would give you “nothing” for an answer, you spent two days kissing her ass to find out that you woke her up snoring in the middle of the night two weeks ago.

#16 No more “nothing.” Guys all know what nothing means, and it means anything but nothing. Instead of tip-toeing around her and kissing her ass whenever she felt the need for some attention, you don’t have to answer to anyone or worry about someone else’s emotional needs before your own. [Read: Letting go of your ex: 15 ways to make it much easier]

#17 Your refrigerator can be filled with your likes again. When you started to date her, you probably had to remove the two cases of beer, herring, and quart of milk that you had in there. She always thought that you couldn’t take care of yourself or buy the right food.

But now you can admit you did it on purpose. Feel free to eat what you want from now on. You don’t have to miss her “taking care of you.”

#18 No more obligations to hang out with her family. If there is one thing that will always pick you up, it is that you don’t have to deal with her family members anymore. Even if you loved her brother, her Aunt Ethel was always a bitch. The best part about not missing her is that you won’t ever have to put on a fake smile, a bad Christmas sweater, or suck up to her overbearing daddy again. [Read: 15 types of bad girlfriends who’ll make any guy’s life feel like hell]

#19 No more trying to change you. No woman is ever happy with the guy in her life. She dates him because she likes about 60% and figures she can convert the other 40%.

If you felt like she was always trying to change you, there is a good reason – she was. What you won’t miss about your girlfriend is the fact that she was always trying to bend and shape you. You can now be whoever you want to be.

#20 No more pressure. Girls need an agenda and a goal. Her goal was likely to “take it to the next level” whether you were ready or not. The best part about her being gone is that you don’t ever have to be pushed along kicking and screaming. You call the shots, make it casual with the next girl, and have sex for fun again.

[Read: The 10 stages of a breakup and how to get through each of them]

Bottom line – although you were always thinking, “I miss my girlfriend,” there are other fish in the sea. Whether she comes back or not, the best way to move on is to NOT think about all the things you miss about her, but rather the things that you don’t.

The post I Miss My Girlfriend: 20 Ways to Banish the Thought for Good is the original content of LovePanky - Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships.

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